It’s Bob Burg month and here is another article worth checking out. If you want to see Bob Burg speak live – here is where you can find him:

http://www.burg.com/events/

The late John Wooden; great human being and Hall-of-Fame coach of the record-setting UCLA basketball team (10 national championships in 12 years), wrote about the traits of “courtesy, politeness and consideration.”

“People like to help, to be polite, to be considerate. I believe it’s basic human nature. And it’s a funny thing; when you start displaying courtesy, politeness and consideration, people start displaying them right back.”

“But” one might ask, “shouldn’t one do this just because it’s right?”

Sure. However, the results are simply the natural and benevolent effect.

“But, isn’t it contradictory to be nice if it’s serving a direct purpose?”

In my opinion, just the opposite. It seems perfectly congruent to be nice and obtain satisfaction, as well. Why would we want to be any other way?

This point is endorsed by a famous general not known for having a sunny disposition. In his book, General Patton’s Principles on Life And Leadership, Porter B. Williamson quotes the General, displaying his true knack for understanding positive persuasion principles.

According to Patton, “…{T}he Golden Rule should be written, ‘What you do unto others is the way you are going to be done unto!’”

Patton even quoted a master of people skills, Benjamin Franklin who said, “If rascals knew how much money they could make by being righteous, the rascals would become righteous through pure rascality!”

Well, we could debate the motives all day long, and maybe even pick it apart philosophically if we really wanted to. Instead, I’d suggest we just do the right things and act (be) the right way.

First, just because it’s right.

Secondly, because it elicits the other person to do the same.

Finally, because it’s simply a great way to obtain satisfaction from others…and have everyone come out a winner!

Note by Mark Hiatt: I’ve seen many people join my leads groups (which are just formalized expressions of networking) with the thought that they want to “get leads.” Soon afterwards, they realize that to get leads from the group they have to demonstrate they are givers and want to help the other members.  Bob makes a great point in that in a perfect world, we would all join a leads group or network with others first and foremost because it’s an opportunity to give – but the world does not teach all of us this idea from the beginning. We don’t have Mary Poppins raising us and instilling ideas via magic.  So we start where we start. Is it ok if someone approaches networking with the idea of giving to get? Absolutely. Because in the end, it’s the giving that leaves the biggest impression, not the getting.

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For those of you that don’t know Bob Burg – I highly recommend his book “The Go-Giver”. It is a quick read and a very enjoyable read. And it really had a big effect on me. Being in the networking business, I have been focused on giving and helping others understand how giving can change their lives.

But Bob threw another word at me that I had not been using: “Value”

And suddenly I found myself asking: “Am I really providing my customers, my networking associates, and anyone I come into contact with the value they deserve? Is there more I can do?” The answer came back “Yes.” (But that’s a story for another time.)

I’ve also been following a man by the name of Bradley Will. He has been taking the social media world by storm and has an interesting blog: www.bradleywill.com. And Bradley shares a quick video on vimeo about how Bob Burg pulled him onto stage at one of his events – check it out . . .

Click here to view the embedded video.

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Leads Group Success Path – Article #2

There you are sitting in a leads group meeting with multiple networking partners* (or even meeting informally in the coffee shop with one networking partner). Your time to talk has come. You stand up to tell a little bit about yourself. Maybe you have a minute – maybe ten minutes.

What do you say?

Wait a minute. Don’t answer yet. What are the ramifications for NOT saying something worthwhile? Do you lose that minute? Do you lose ten minutes? Or do you possibly lose a lot more?

Did you know that you spend over 4000 minutes (66+ hours) in your leads group meeting each year. Add drive time, one-on-ones, etc. and you can probably double that time. For successful leads group participants making anywhere from $10,000-$100,000 per year from their leads group efforts, that’s time well spent.

But for unsuccessful leads group participants? Frustrating.

For those of you currently falling into the second category of participants I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you are in complete control of your success. The bad news? You are in complete control of your success.

This brings me back to the original question. Your time to talk has come.

What do you say?

After 10 years of creating leads groups I can tell you what most people say:

“Hello I’m a ________________ (occupation) and we offer ________, ________, and ____________ (services).

Go to any leads group or networking event where the attendees get a chance to give a “commercial” or “elevator speech” and that’s what you hear from 80% of the people. Now let’s talk about what the 20% who have decided to take control of this process (and who, you guessed it, get 80% of the leads) are saying.

Successful leads group participants are saying something that:

1. everyone in the room can understand and relate to,

2. adds value to the listener (not the speaker),

3. generates curiosity and a desire to find out more, and/or

4. provides further insight into the benefits of their service/product.

If you are not doing one of those things every time you speak, you are wasting a huge opportunity and your chances of success are greatly diminished. Now please don’t think that I’m saying you must be a great speaker. Many of the more successful networkers and leads group members I’ve met are soft spoken and uncomfortable speaking in front of people. Be yourself. (Though your speaking skills will grow – you won’t be able to help it.)

And as yourself, don’t ever stand up to speak to someone in your network without accomplishing one of the four things stated above.

Your time to speak has come. What will you say?

*Networking Partner: someone with whom you can pass and receive business leads or valuable information. This is typically someone who does not compete with you for business and there is a mutual desire to help one another.

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Empower Your Fellow Members With This Amazing Leads Group Tool

Leads Group Success Path – article #1

Do you take your fellow leads group members for granted?

Your first inclination might be to say, “of course not – I appreciate every lead they send me.”

That’s not what I’m asking. Let me rephrase. Do you do everything within your power to make it easy for your members to understand your business at their level and from their point of view – or do you attend each meeting and “wing” it?

If you are one of the 80% that wing it – you are experiencing maybe 20% of the success you could experience in that group. But take heart. You are probably a victim of the vacuum effect. And this effect is easily and enjoyably reversible.

Often a leads group will get stuck in the habit of giving commercials that allow us to understand the features of each members’ business, but not much more.

“I am an accountant and I sell accounting services, bookkeeping, tax preparation, etc. to medium to small size businesses.”

This accountant may even elaborate on what that means. “For example, one of my clients is a Dry Cleaning business where I provide quarterly and yearly tax prep, blah, blah, blah.”

Here’s the million dollar question: Do I feel more comfortable passing leads to that accountant after that commercial (or after twenty more just like it)? Do I better know how to pass leads to that accountant after that commercial? No. Now if I am in the leads group with that accountant for months and even years I will start to learn how to help him or her. That’s the beauty of a leads group. By meeting every day you almost can’t help but learn a little about how to help each other – eventually.

I don’t know about you but I’m not interested in “eventually.” I want to know how I can make each moment count. This article is a beginning to get us on the path to leads group excellence. And the first concept that is absolutely necessary to understand is that we can no longer think in terms of what we know about our business. We need to start thinking in terms of what our fellow members know and understand about two aspects of our business: sales and benefits.

Sales:

What is your sales process? Who do you sell to? What demographic do you sell to? What type of company do you sell to? What are your top five selling points? Which selling point do you emphasize in which customer situation/problem/challenge? What problem do you help to solve? How do you help a customer recognize that they have a problem? What does that problem look like, feel like, taste like? What does the solution look, feel, taste like? Do you have competition? Is there any difference between you and the competition?

Benefits:

How does your customer benefit by doing business with you?

You might think the answer to that question is obvious and it is . . . to you. But you must treat the rest of us like gradeschoolers learning a new language. We don’t know your business and if you want to be successful in a leads group, you absolutely must help all of us to feel COMPLETELY comfortable talking to people about what you do and why you and your company are going to make us look good when we refer you.

One place to start is your level of customer service. What happens if a customer is not happy with your product? What do you do? Why should I feel comfortable sending my valued customer to you? Do you understand what I am risking by sending you a valued client or contact of mine? How does your service compare to the competition? What specifically do you do to make your customers happy as they purchase the product and after they have purchased it?

In everyday usage, a vacuum is a volume of space that is essentially empty of matter. Leads do not get passed in a vacuum. A great leads group is born from a group of members willing to learn and understand their business in a way that others could easily go out and sell the same service. A leads group is like your own personal sales force. Yet like a sales force, if your members are not given the knowledge, tools and reason-why that will enable them to provide you with leads – well, you can guess what will happen.

We have begun a process here. Where does it end? If all goes well it ends with you having all the knowledge necessary to be a master of both networking and leads group tactics, skills and tools. Success is inevitable, given time and dedication to learning.

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Sometimes it is necessary, as the cartoon character Snagglepuss phrased it, to “exit, stage right” – or left or up or down or anywhere, really, that is not directly in front of the NA (New Acquaintance). Anyone who has been networking has encountered at least one situation where you ask: How do I get out of this conversation? This article contains the answer you seek. But, as with all good answers, we have to determine the right question.

Is the question: “How do I get out of this conversation?” Let’s take a look. There may be a number of types of New Acquaintances (NAs) with whom you want to end a conversation quickly:

1. Drones: The Drone is easy to spot – they talk and talk and talk with both ears closed to your views. (Whose mom hasn’t said, “God gave you one mouth and two ears for a reason young man!” – just mine? Ok, moving on.)
2. Offenders: These interesting folks seem to have no awareness of the effect words can have or the thought that even like-minded people want to get to know you a little before hearing your views on religion, politics, sex, nasty habits of others, shabby dressing habits of others, etc. 
3. Bores: Not much explanation needed – do you feel like pulling up a couch and lying down? You’ve just met one.

Maybe you have experienced others but these are the big three.  So there you are talking with the NA, or NAH as one of my seminar attendees put it (New Acquaintance from Hell). What do you do now? Many would ask:

“How do I get out of this conversation?”

 Is that really the question? Questions have power. If we are seeking a powerful answer, we need to be sure we truly ask a powerful question. How about: “How do I get out of this conversation in a manner that leaves both of us feeling good about our interaction?” Not a bad question. But is it the best one? Let’s keep exploring.

There is one skill every good networker needs in order to tackle this subject: The Re-Direct.

The re-direct is a way to move people to a different topic. Why do you want to do this?

1. The topic is too familiar to your NA (Drone)
2. The topic is not appropriate (Offender)
3. The topic is boring to you (Bore)

If you encounter such a situation, you can often re-direct the NA to a new topic using a simple formula.

“Wait a minute”, you say, “this is starting to sound like a way to keep the conversation going. Are you trying to pull a fast one?” Bear with me. We are going to get to how to get out of the conversation but maybe there is yet another more powerful question to ask. Back to the re-direct – let’s look at an example:

Henry: “So then my pet hamster, his name is Joe Bob, well he was walking round and round that darn wheel and . . .”

You: “Did you say you have a pet hamster?”

Henry: “Yeah, as I was saying . . .”

You: “Now before you get to the rest of the story Henry, let me ask you this because I’m interested – what was your favorite pet growing up and where did you grow up?”

Henry: Well, uh, I had a Boxer I loved and I grew up in Portland.

If we had to create a formula for the re-direct it would look something like this:

Clarify+Because+Old/New=New Subject

Begin by asking a clarifying question (good listening skill to develop anyway). The clarifying question gives you a reason to interrupt his pattern of behavior. Then follow up with: “before you finish the story, let me ask you a question.” Be sure to add the word “because” (see article entitled “A Powerful Word” for more on this subject). Then you introduce a few new subjects, the first of which is related to the old subject that the NA introduced. Based on Henry’s answer, we could explore two possible subjects – pets we loved growing up or Portland, OR. You want to focus in on the one that gives you the best chance of finding something in common with Henry. I grew up in Portland so I would choose that subject. I might say:

“You grew up in Portland? No way, I grew up there also. What did you like the most about living there?”

And we are off on a new subject.

The beauty of the Re-Direct is that you are breaking this person out of their usual pattern. You are taking control of the conversation and leading it in a new direction. Here’s an interesting question:

Why the *&%$^# do I want to do such a thing with this person?

I understand that sentiment. I really do. But speaking as a past representative of the socially inadequate – good people sometimes say stupid things when they are nervous.

Do you really want to give up on someone two or three minutes into a conversation? Here is an interesting question:

What if there is something good, maybe even great, about every person I meet? Or possibly Can I learn to quickly bring the best out of every person I meet?

Some of the best people I have met and developed relationships with started out as a Bore or Drone and, yes, occasionally even an Offender. And if you can bring the best out of these folks? They will be your fan for LIFE.

That being said, perhaps you still just want to get out of the conversation. I like to deliver on my promises so let’s take a look at how to do that quickly and easily. The key to getting out of a conversation while not offending your NA is to have your delivery of the exit phrase:

1. Feel natural to you and your NA
2. Be plausible to the situation
3. Be urgent enough to allow you to interrupt and leave

Exit Strategy #1: Set up the exit from the beginning.

            “Hello Mr. Smith. Very nice to meet you. I just want to mention from the start that I read an article on networking before attending this event and I have a goal of meeting 20 people tonight. I also have certain things that the article told me to find out about each person that might allow me to help your business when I get back to my office. If it looks like we might be able to help each other we can set up a time to talk sometime this week. What do you say, do you want to play along?”

Wow. Bing, Bang, Boom – you are in control the whole way now and there will be little opportunity for the person to be offensive, boring or long-winded. But yes I know – some people are determined to be offensive, boring or long-winded and in a few rare cases they will try to wrestle control back from you. So what if you still end up in a conversation that you want to get out of?

Exit Strategy #2: I have to go to the bathroom.

            “I am so sorry to interrupt you but that last drink snuck up on me. Can you please give me your card so that we can connect by e-mail. There might be ways that I can help your business and I would love to have your card on file in case one of my customers need you.”

Not rocket science, right? You can even start to bounce up and down if you want to sell it more. Don’t want to lie? Leave a pen in the bathroom at the beginning of the event. You have to go to the bathroom to get your pen eventually, right? The excuse (going to the bathroom) is not as important as the last part. You are validating the person’s existence by letting them know that you want to help them if possible. I say, be part of the cure, not the problem. Be nice – maybe they are the way they are because they had a tough time in life.

There’s just one thing left to do in this article – uncover the most powerful question we could ask relating to this subject.

What might it be?

How can I empower and uplift myself and others with each new acquaintance I meet – and how can I maximize my time and energy at each networking event?

Now THAT is powerful.

Copyright 2010 by Mark Hiatt

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1. Bring a group of business owners and salespeople together each week
2. Build relationships with each other
3. Pass business leads to each other

1. dramatically increases the energy and enthusiasm of the group (and in fact the occasional sub would add new life and new perspective)
2. increases the close rate with guests
3. decreases the “burden” of the group and less people would quit over time

1. Someone coming out of their shell. If you meet someone who is a little shy at a networking event, let him or her know this is a great first step into the world of networking. “This is a chance for you to try out a leads group and see how leads groups work,” you could say. “I will write down what I would like for you to say on my behalf so that all you have to do is read the card. My members will love to meet you.”
2. Someone in another leads group with attendance requirements and create a trade agreement. “If you come to my group when I can’t make it – I will come to yours when you can’t make it.” Set up a limit in advance: “we agree to only ask each other once per month at the most to substitute.”
3. Someone (if possible) who has a business not represented in your group. Another aspect of this is to make sure the group knows to allow attendance partners to give their own commercial as well as yours. You never know – the person may end up joining the group but that’s a great reason to lose an attendance partner. You then just find another in a related industry and soon you are surrounded by your power partners.

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We continue in this QuickTip with another excerpt from 12 Weeks to Leads Group Success.

“Leads Group Success Definition #2: One-on-One – a one-on-one is when two or more leads group members get together outside of the regular meeting time in order to build a stronger business relationship with each other and gain a better understanding of how to pass and receive leads among the participants. The One-on-One is a critical activity for you and when you look back on your successful leads group experience years later you will mark it as the most important habit you created. Leads Group Success Habit #2: Schedule a one-on-one every week with a different member.” The excerpt above discusses the one activity could very well make or break your success in a leads group. How does this apply to networking? If you attend a networking event and meet someone who might be able to pass you leads (and hopefully you can reciprocate), then what do you do? You find out a little bit about the other person, right? Is he or she someone with whom I might want to build a relationship? Do we share similar values and ethics (assuming that’s important to you)? And can my customers or my network use what he or she is offering? If the answers to those questions point you toward wanting to develop a relationship with this person then it is important that you understand the first commandment of networking: Thou Shalt Communicate Or thou shalt lose that relationship quickly. Let’s go back for another excerpt: “At first, I highly recommend setting up a 30 minute meeting (at least) with each member. You can meet at the coffee shop before the meeting or after the meeting or if really pressed for time you can set up a phone appointment (though in-person meetings are three times more effective). Here are some questions you can ask in your first one-on-one: Leads Group Success Tool #1: Your first set of One-on-One questions. What makes your business unique? What is your most important selling point? What is your second most important selling point? What situation are your customers typically in when they need your service? (e.g. moving the company, getting married, getting divorced, expanding the company, making $100,000 per year or more in an executive-level job, etc., etc. – there could be many different situations that lead a person to need the service of your fellow member(s) – find out what those situations are) How do you find new customers? What is your sales process? What can I say to a potential prospect of yours that might make them more interested in speaking to you about your service/product? That’s enough questions to start with. Naturally, before you go to this first one-on-one, you want to answer these questions for your own business as well so that you are prepared for questions asked of you. Let’s do that right now. Print this section and write out answers to the following questions – then bring this print-out with you to the first one-on-one: What makes your business unique? What is your most important selling point? What is your second most important selling point? What situation are your customers typically in when they need your service? How do you find new customers? What is your sales process? What can I say to a potential prospect of yours that might make them more interested in speaking to you about your service/product? Not sure about the answer to some of those questions? Talk with others in your industry. Brainstorm with members of your leads group (this is one of the many advantages of being in a leads group). Talk with your customers. The more detailed you can be with answers to the above questions, the easier it will be for your members to help you.” The importance of the above questions as a starting point for your new networking alliance applies to an informal networking situation as much, if not more, than a leads group setting. The questions above are great ones for your first meeting – don’t use them again. Your next meeting will require more in-depth questions and each time you meet, your understanding of your networking partner’s products, aspirations, enthusiasms, customer service, etc. will grow until you each are raving fans of the others service. And when it becomes fun referring business to each other – that’s when the cha-ching rings loudly through your networking world. But here’s the crazy thing: at that point . . . You won’t care about the money. You’ll be too busy having fun. Life is short, Live big! Mark Hiatt Copyright 2010 by Mark Hiatt

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By Mark Hiatt As we discussed in the last Networking QuickTip, leads groups are a good case study to learn about networking success.

Therefore I will share a few excerpts over the next few months from my new program 12 Weeks to Leads Group Success. Enjoy. Leads Group Success Fact #1: A leads group is first and foremost about giving, not receiving. It’s amazing that in all the top-notch leads groups I have seen over the years, not one of them rallied around the battlecry: “All for One If That One is Me.” Imagine a leads group like that – members looking squinty-eyed around the table at each other week after week thinking, “you better pass a lead to me this week you good for nothing welchers or I sure won’t be passing any.” Now imagine the opposite. You are participating in a group of givers. The members all enjoy their work, they enjoy the contribution they make to their customers’ welfare, health, prosperity, or whatever benefit their customers receive. But in addition to helping their customers, these members that you meet with every week have a true interest in your success as well. They take time out of each week to think about how they might be able to help you be more successful and they take time to get to know you and build a strong relationship that will stand the test of time. When you look around the table each week you see smiles and looks of genuine affection and liking. This image was and is what a leads group is meant to be. It is a natural thing that when you join a leads group you will be wondering if you will receive leads. Don’t apologize for that. I believe it’s healthy to know what you want to experience in life. But it is necessary to note that the amount of leads you ultimately receive will be determined by the group’s motivation to give to you and others. Let’s look at that again because it is a critical thought: The amount of leads you ultimately receive will be determined by the group’s motivation to give to you and others. For you to be a part of that success formula, your desire to give leads must also be high. Leads Group Success Habit #1: When you first see a member or guest of your leads group, regardless of the situation, ask yourself, “What can I do for this person today that he or she might appreciate?” If you form the habit of trying to uncover ways to help both members and guests, you will build a deep level of trust in a short period of time. Leads Group Success Definition #1: Trust – what occurs when one member believes the other member has his or her best interests in mind. Now in addition to members joining a group wondering if they will receive enough leads from the group, many people come into a leads group afraid they might not be able to pass enough leads. You might be that person – and that, too, is ok and perfectly natural. My experience with leads groups tells me that anyone can learn to be a good lead passer if they relax and focus on improving their networking skills and building strong relationships within the group. You can not force yourself to pass leads – that’s not how it works. I would even encourage you to not try to pass leads during your first three months in the group. Surpised? Don’t be. Passing leads must come naturally and comfortably. Notice I didn’t say, “don’t pass leads during your first three months.” If a lead comes naturally from your interactions with your network – go with it. Just don’t put pressure on yourself where you feel you must immediately pass leads. A leads group is a long-term commitment and can be the best marketing decision a person ever makes – but it takes time. In my leads groups I require members to join for a year because I don’t want someone to join with the mindset that they will get some business and then move on to the next marketing attempt. That attitude is a sure sign that the member won’t last more than three months. Life is short, Live big! Copyright 2010 by Mark Hiatt

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